When You Know What To Do But Can’t Do It: The Hidden Impact of Executive Function Challenges on Daily Life
- Sarah Hardy
- 6 days ago
- 3 min read
Living with ADHD or Autism often means you know what needs doing, but somehow you just… don’t do it. You might sit at your desk, staring at your to-do list, fully aware of what to tackle first, yet paralysed. Or you find yourself scrolling, tidying, or avoiding entirely, even though the task is clear and important.
This frustrating experience is one of the most common and least understood aspects of neurodivergence: executive function difficulties.
In this post, we’ll explore why you can’t always translate intention into action, how this affects daily life, and what you can do to work around it with more self-compassion and strategy.
What Is Executive Function — And Why Does It Matter?
Executive functions are a set of mental processes that help you plan, prioritise, start, and complete tasks. They’re like the conductor of your brain’s orchestra — keeping everything in sync.
When you’re neurodivergent, this “conductor” may struggle to keep time. You do know what you’re supposed to do, but initiating, sequencing, and sustaining the action can feel disproportionately hard.
Research suggests that around 80–90% of adults with ADHD and many Autistic adults experience significant challenges with executive functioning and this impacts almost every area of life, from work to relationships to basic self-care.
Why Knowing Isn’t Enough
Many people assume that if you just had enough discipline or motivation, you’d get things done. But that misses the point entirely.
Neurodivergent brains often struggle with task initiation, which is not about laziness but about how your brain processes and prioritises. It’s also influenced by emotional factors: if the task feels overwhelming, pointless, or shame-inducing, the “brakes” can slam on.
You might experience:
Procrastination even on simple tasks.
Avoidance of things that seem “too big.”
Feeling physically stuck despite mental urgency.
Bursts of productivity under pressure — but burnout follows.
The Daily Impact of Executive Function Challenges
Here are just a few ways this hidden struggle might show up:
At Work
You delay replying to emails because you don’t know where to start.
Important tasks get buried under reactive, easier ones.
Projects get started but rarely finished without external accountability.
At Home
Washing piles up even though you’re thinking about it constantly.
You forget appointments despite reminders.
Household routines feel impossible to maintain.
Emotionally
Guilt for “wasting time.”
Anxiety about being judged as lazy or incompetent.
Shame and frustration that erode confidence over time.
How to Understand and Work With Your Neurodiversity
While there’s no magic fix, you can make life easier and kinder to yourself.
1. Shrink the Task
Break things down into the smallest possible next step — and just focus there. Instead of “clean the kitchen,” try “clear the table.” Success builds momentum.
2. Use External Supports
Rely on visual cues, timers, or even another person to prompt action. Accountability — even sending a friend a photo of your progress — helps.
3. Reduce the Emotional Load
If a task feels emotionally loaded, name it. “I’m avoiding because I feel overwhelmed by how big this is” helps lower shame and clears space to begin.
4. Set Up Triggers
Pair tasks with existing habits. For example, “start the washing machine while the kettle boils” links actions in your routine.
5. Work With Your Natural Rhythms
Notice when your energy is highest — and schedule harder tasks then. Reserve low-energy times for easier wins.
A Note on Self-Compassion
Perhaps the most important strategy is to remember this isn’t a character flaw. Your brain simply processes differently, and that’s not your fault.
Instead of berating yourself, ask: “What would make this easier?” Sometimes the smallest adjustment is enough to get you moving.
Ready to Find What Works for You?
If you’re tired of feeling stuck despite knowing exactly what needs to be done, coaching can help you uncover strategies tailored to your life — and your brain.
Book a free discovery call today to explore how we can work together.
Struggling to get started even when you know what to do? Learn why executive function challenges make daily life harder and what helps.
FAQs:
Q: Why can’t I start tasks even when I know what to do?
A: Many neurodivergent people struggle with executive function — the brain’s ability to plan, start, and complete tasks. This makes it hard to turn intentions into action, even when the next step is clear.
Q: What is executive dysfunction?
A: Executive dysfunction happens when the mental processes that organise and carry out tasks don’t work smoothly, leading to procrastination, avoidance, and overwhelm.
Q: How can I improve executive function in daily life?
A: Break tasks into tiny steps, reduce emotional pressure, use visual cues or timers, and schedule demanding tasks for your natural high-energy times.
External References:
CHADD on executive function: https://chadd.org
