Do you ever feel like you can’t stop moving, thinking, or doing something—anything?
Maybe you sit down to relax, only to feel an immediate, uncomfortable urge to get up and do something “productive.” Or perhaps you finally have a break, but instead of enjoying it, your brain starts spiraling through all the things you should be doing.
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. ADHD makes stillness feel unnatural—sometimes even unbearable. But why does this happen? And what can we do about it?
Let’s explore the science behind ADHD and restlessness, the guilt that often comes with slowing down, and why stillness can feel like the hardest thing in the world when you have ADHD.
Why ADHD Brains Struggle with Rest & Stillness
Many people think of ADHD as just hyperactivity—the stereotype of a child bouncing off the walls. But even in adults, ADHD often manifests as an inability to “just be.”
🔹 Physical Restlessness – Feeling the need to move, fidget, or keep busy.
🔹 Mental Restlessness – A constant stream of thoughts that won’t quiet down.
🔹 Emotional Restlessness – Struggling with boredom, guilt, or anxiety when “doing nothing.”
📊 A study published in Cognitive Neuroscience found that ADHD brains show increased activity in the default mode network (DMN), the part of the brain responsible for self-referential thoughts (like worrying, replaying conversations, or planning). (Christoff et al., 2016)
💡 This means that when ADHD brains try to “rest,” they often flood with thoughts instead—leading to discomfort, agitation, or even guilt.
The Guilt of Rest: Why ADHD Brains Equate Stillness with Laziness
Have you ever tried to relax, only for your brain to whisper:
💭 “You should be doing something productive.”
💭 “You don’t deserve to rest yet.”
💭 “There’s so much you could be doing right now.”
📌 This guilt comes from years of masking, societal conditioning, and internalised pressure to ‘keep up’ with neurotypical expectations.
🔹 ADHDers are often seen as “not trying hard enough” growing up, leading to overcompensating in adulthood.
🔹 Struggles with task initiation mean we often feel “behind,” even when we’ve been productive all day.
🔹 Hyperfocus mode tricks us into thinking we’re only “good enough” when we’re achieving something.